Red, White and Other Colours
by thatchick21
Summary: The true meaning behind the flags colours. Warning: Bad words and sexual situtions.
1. France

A/N: Yes I should be updating my other fic but I had to get this out first. Review!

France watched America walk up his large driveway headed straight for his door. The French man wondered why America had come over unannounced this time when his doorbell rang.

"Bonjour what do you want America?" France said rudely considering he had a 'friend' over.

"I'm doing a survey…" America started sound unusually business like. Which meant he was up to something, "What does your flag colors mean?"

France kept his expression calm wondering why America would want to know.

"Well red means…" France was about to start when America cut him off saying that it had to be the real reason not the whole honor or freedom or whatever stuff that France was about to say.

"Okay then, red is for roses and white is for.." France winked at his 'friend' that had emerged from the blondes bed, "And blue is for what you see when you look into my eyes as I hover over your body…"

America had known Frances would've been bad but he was expecting the last one. So now America was off to the next house so he could complete his mission.


	2. America

A/N: I'm hoping to get more chapters up but my computer likes to freak out on me! Review Read and hope for faster updates! :)

The surveyor, America thought of the reasons behind his flag colors while on his way to the next house to probably be screamed at or see something he never wanted to see. Red is for the delicious taste of ketchup when you dip you French fries in it. Or when your Big Mac is covered with it. America started to drool over the idea of eating a Big Mac.

Keeping his mind going in order he thought about blue which represents his favorite type of pants, blue jeans. The great thing about blue jeans is that you can wear them pretty much anywhere. In any time period after 1900. Okay so maybe America mostly liked wearing blue jeans because it drove England insane for some odd reason. Something about a gentleman never wears jeans to a huge social event like the Queen's wedding but how was he supposed to know that?

White really did just stand for freedom though after talking to other nations… America blushed at how perverted some people could be.

America walked across the yard of the next country not really caring that it was rude.


	3. Germany

A/N: This was way faster! So review! Please? By the way if there is any spelling mistakes I'm really sorry but I'm not writing this on Microsoft Word so no spell check.

America headed up to the next house. One of the scarier houses. The house of the Germans. America swallowed.. totally not scared. Definitely not. At least that was what America told himself as he rang the door bell of the impressive mansion.

"Hallo, America how can I help you today?" Germany answered the door. America heard someone yell from upstairs "West is it Mattie?" America tried not to think about why his brother would be here.

"Well, I was sent here to inquire as to why your flag has the colors of.." America checked his paper, "Red, black and yellow?" Alfred was proud of himself for sticking to his bosses script.

"Well..." Germany was about to say the opposite of what America wanted to hear.

"I mean your personal reasons not the public one.." America interrupted the blonde man.

"Oh well then umm lets see, Red because my dumb bruder had to be represented so he wanted the colors of his 'awesome' eyes. Yellow for beer of course and black is for the color of military boots, the best footwear there is." Germany eyed America's colourful footwear. Germany had gave his explanation so rapidly America had to write quickly using improper English that England would of slapped him for using. But hey he had to write it down fast because you never ask Germany to repeat himself. Ever. America shivered remembering the time he had.

"So may I speak with Prussia?" America asked unsure. After all that might mean actually entering the Germans' house. Something America didn't exactly want to do.

"Ja... Bruder! Stop fixing your hair and get down here!" Germany suddenly yelled. America had a small stroke. Germans and yelling isn't something America or anybody particularly liked.


	4. Poland

A/N: Review please! :)

Prussian could not appear before Northern Italy came to the door. Naked. "Ciao America! Ve~ What are you doing here?" Germany blushed and yelled at Italy to go put on some clothes. He turned to explain things to America but the blonde pretended not to care. So deciding not to embarrass himself any further Germany told America to have a seat on the porch, that his 'bruder' would be down shortly. Then he shut the door. America sat down waiting for what to him felt like a few years. Finally America just left because he didn't feel like waiting any longer. (In reality he sat there for about 2 minutes.)

Jumping into his car he decided he'd go to Poland's next. Hopefully Poland would be in because America wasn't ready to visit Russia quite yet. America knew that at least three countries would probably be at the tall scary man's house. America was in luck.

"Like- America! Hey~~" Poland answered the door jumping up and down, "Liet! Totes come to the door! We have -like- a visitor that isn't uber creepy!" Poland was wearing a mini-skirt and button up pink shirt. America thought he looked pretty fine. Then he remembered to be a surveyor.

"I have a question, I'd like to ask both of you: What's the true -not political- meanings behind your flag colors?" America realized his question was kind of lengthy and he'd need to rewrite it...again.

"Well mine is like totes super cool! When you mix red with -like- white what do you get?" Poland paused for effect, "Pink! I wanted my flag to be just pink -hot pink- but my boss said it would be 'unpolitical correct' and 'would make us look weak' but whatever..." America wrote down everything Poland said before turning to the quiet Lithuania.


	5. Lithuania

A/N: So here's the next chapter! Review!

America smiled brightly at his friend, "Same question." Lithuania seemed to think for a moment, then responded, "Well red is for the colour... actually America to tell you honestly I didn't have much say. Poland chose red, green is a colour I didn't see much of while in Russia so everyone decided I should put it in there, and well yellow is just a colour that a lot of powerful countries-er- when I was just a small country- had in their flag. So my bosses put it in there to make me seem more powerful."

America wrote it down, not at all shocked. Secretly America wished he was older so he could sculpted Lithuania's flag but Iggy wouldn't let him time travel anymore after the whole eating the bread and resulting in scones coming out half-decent thing. So since he got all the information he came for America continued on his way.


	6. Italy

A/N: Hey! So review and read, if you please! :)

America decided he wanted to skip down the list to a place he wouldn't be so close to Russia. He decided to head for a boot. America walked up the sidewalk whistling a tune.

"Feli, get the door! Its Hamburger Bastard... damn.. he's not here... fucking Potato Bastard!" was the dialogue leading up to a disgruntle Southern Italy opening the door,

"What do you want Hamburger Bastard?" America figured best to just talk with the angry Italian because at least then he wouldn't have to ask his question a zillion times.

"Well..." America reeled off the usual question. Romano stared off in the distance think a little bit. About a minute later he decided just to respond honestly.

"Do you want mine or fratello?" he asked with a sigh. America responded that both would be awesome. Romano flinched, the word 'awesome' was associated with a certain Prussian he hated.

"Okay, well my reasons are green for top of a tomato, red is obviously for a tomato, and white is a wasted tomato. My brother says that 'green is spices, red is red sauces and white is alfredo sauce and some cheeses'." South Italy said this all in pretty much monotone. America had interrupted his afternoon slumber. Okay more like his go to bed the night before and not wake up until sundown the next day slumber but that didn't matter. America noticed he was no longer wanted within a 10 kilo-meter radius of the Southern part Italy so he left.


	7. Greece

A/N: I love anyone who reviews more than my dog... only because he drooled all over my pillow. Review and sorry for any grammar errors!

America decided to go over to Greece next because he needed to sleep somewhere and hotels in Greece where very comfortable. He walked up to the ruins knowing the brunette would most likely be there. Not so much to his surprise America walked in on a fight between Turkey and Greece. Poor Japan just sat there looking miserable. America made himself known be yelling 'Hello' really loud. Greece looked up and Turkey rudely asked what he wanted.

"Well I'm here surveying to see what the personal reasons behind your flag colours are?" America secretly rejoiced in the fact he finally got a question that sounded as cool as he was.

"Well... umm... lets see... blue is for-... the beautiful skies of a clear day... and white... is for... the colour of crisp clean sheets and ...pillows..." Greece said this so slow America himself almost fell asleep. Turkey seemed to get more pissed off at the Greek man per syllabal he said. America smiled at the Greek then turned to Japan his close friend.


	8. Japan

A/N: Review please! (Oh and I don't own Hetalia or the flags of any nation... that I know off :P ) Sorry this is so short but Japan isn't exactly a big talker.

Japan sat up stiffly. He stared at America for a moment seeming to gather his thoughts. Then after a minute he answered.

"Red of course is a colour to represent the sun that rises and falls which brings light to us all. White is the colour of cleanness and purity," Japan took a second to glare at every nation in the room. America shifted uncomfortable. But he had to get one more nation. Though he could probably guess Turkey's reasons. Turkey was to busy glaring at Greece to catch the fact that Japan and America where staring at him expectantly.


	9. Turkey

A/N: I keep meaning to update faster.. I fail. Review!

Turkey took a few more minutes before he realised he was being stared at.

"Oh.. well red stands for the colour of a Greek's blood...," Turkey glared at Greece as Greece glared back, " and white is the best colour for a mask.."

"To cover up... your ugly face..." Greece said tiredly. Turkey got up.

"Say that again!" Turkey yelled.

"I said...," Greece stood slowly, "To cover up your ugly face..." Turkey lunged at the tired man who dodged. America took this as his cue to leave. He decide to head up north even though he was scared of what country that meant.


	10. Belarus

A/N: Review and Request the nation you want next!

America bundled up in his coat then got out of his warm car. Russia was next. Hopefully Latvia would answer the door so America wouldn't have to ask to see him. Even better America hoped Latvia wouldn't be home. America knocked on the large doors and one of his worst fears came true. Belarus answered.

"Pryvitannie. What do you want?" was Belarus's greeting. America hit her with the usual question making sure to say it really fast.

"Hmm okay. Red is for the blood of anyone who touches my brother. Green is the colour of blood in contrast and white is because its on Brother's flag," Belarus smiled in a way that made America want to cry.


	11. Russia

A/N: Sorry all of these seem to be getting shorter. Review!

Next America asked to talk to Russia. Belarus called him to the door then lingered to make sure America didn't try to get at her brother.

"Da, that is an interesting question. Blue is for the colour of tears. Red the colour of blood. And white is for the snow. Da?" Russia smiled creepily then the door seemed to close on its own. America at first debated whether or not to knock again and ask for Ukraine. He decide he should leave. So the brave hero ran out of there and decided he wouldn't ask Ukraine unless he ran into her somewhere else


	12. Canada

A/N: Review!

"Hey little brother!" America shouted seeing Canada outside. Sadly Prussia was there too.

"Hey I have a question for you!" America said nicely ignoring Prussia.

"Okay shoot.." Canada said a little scared.

"What's your personal reasons behind your flag colours?" America smiled brightly. Canada sighed in relief. Then he thought for a second.

"Well white is for the colour of pancake mix mostly because my boss wouldn't let me do the actual colour. The red is really just the colour of our maple leaves..." Canada sighed again knowing what was coming next.

"So why do you have a giant weed leaf in the middle of your flag?" America asked failing to stifle his curiosity. Canada's face got red with anger.

"It looks nothing- I repeat- nothing like a pot leaf!" Canada yelled trying to decide whether or not he should go grab his hockey stick.

"How would you know what a pot leaf looks like?" America countered. Canada got all flustered and ran inside. America was a little frightened he went to find his hockey stick so he quickly turned to Prussia.


	13. Prussia

A/N: Sorry this took long but I had to find some inspiration... I would update faster if I got more Reviews! So you should -like totes- review! 3

"Dude hurry same question!" America half-shouted at the albino wanting to get his info. and get out. Preferably without a certain Canadian's hockey stick marks all over him.

"Well black is the colour that brings out the awesome colour of my awesome skin. And the awesome bird is Gilbird in his awesome battle gear. Isn't that awesome? You might not understand considering how un-awesome you... Hey where you going? You can't leave mid-awesome rant!" Prussia yelled after America who had heard Canada storming down the stairs of his house. Probably with a hockey stick in hand. Not that America was scared. Nope totally not.

"Sorry bye~!" America yelled back jumping in his car and speeding away. He smiled to himself thinking 'who next?'


	14. Spain

A/N: Review pretty please? And you can request which nation is next!

America figured he get the last member of the Bad Touch Trio out of the way. So he decided to travel to Spain's house and pray that Romano wasn't there. Everyone knew to stay away when the hot-tempered Italian was near the Spaniard. Unless you wanted to cursed at for an hour straight in several different languages. America walked up the path way crossing his fingers.

"_Hola_! What can I do for you _mi amigo_?" Spain smiled answering the door. America let out a relieved sigh. Romano wasn't at Spain's.

"Hello, I have a survey question for you," America began, "what is your personal meaning of your flag colours?"

Spain thought for a few seconds.

"Well, my emblem is just to make my flag look more unique..." Spain informed America pausing to think again. America wrote it down as the Spaniard thought.

"Hmm... red is for tomatoes of course... like Romano's red cheeks... and yellow is for the glorious sun!" Spain smiled, America wrote it down then smiled Spain. Spain was about to invite America for dinner when a pissed Romano walked up.

"Damn potato bastard tried to... What the fuck is that hamburger bastard doing here!" Romano yelled. America just backed away slowly giving Spain a sympathetic look before hurrying back to his car. 'Poor Spain' America thought as he drove away seeing Romano throw tomatoes at Spain while yelling at him. America couldn't decide where he should go next. Asia? Northern Europe? Or maybe down to Africa...?


	15. China

A/N: Review! and this chapter is as requested by Chandinee Richards because I like cookies... :D Request the next!

America flipped a coin. Heads he'd got to Norway, Tails he'd go to South Korea. It landed on tails so off he went to Asia.

"Okay, South Korea's house should be somewhere..." America wasn't looking forward to getting groped and claimed. Unfortunately he got lost. Maybe it was do to him looking at his country only map. He somehow ended up in front of the eldest Asian nations house. He decided to just stop there to get it over with.

"Nín hǎo, America, aru. What can I do for you, aru?" China greeted America respectfully. America noticed the elder seemed to be rushed and distracted.

"Well I was wondering your personal reasons for your flag colours, and if you could direct me to South Korea's house..." America said in a hurried way so he wouldn't be a bother.

"Of course, well red is for the sun, that what despite what Japan says, rises here aru. The stars are for fireworks, aru.. Now if you excuse me... aru... oh! the Korea's are southeast from here aru..." With that China shut the down. 'Not polite' thought America. He was going to knock again until he heard a certain laugh through the door.

"Kol kol kol kol, who was that?" Russia's voice said. America didn't wait around to hear China's reply but instead ran off in following China's vague instructions. But should he just give up? Maybe he should just go do Norway or some other country...


End file.
